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Change Can Be A Success
It is September. School is now in session. If you are a parent this may be music to your ears. Hopefully your kids are settling in to their new routines, meeting new friends, and getting used to their teachers.
School is not always fun. There is homework and studying and of course tests. But there are also a number of good social aspects of school. Therefore, parents look for and weigh all of their options before placing their children in a school. We at Abilities1st want this school year to be one of the best for your children. In the spirit of wanting the best for children I believe in times of change (such as starting a new school year), it is important to help children effectively deal with change. Everyone, a child or an adult, likes to be able to anticipate to some degree what is going to occur. The problem with change is that it becomes harder to know with certainty what is going to happen. However, with the proper tools children can learn to embrace change.
The following are 6 ways parents can help children deal with change.
1. Change is a fact of life and will continue to occur. In one way or another something will change. Some are big changes and others are small. The key is to realize that change can be exciting and fun. Change does not always mean there is going to be a problem. Talk with kids about the positive changes in their lives. For example, when they become older they are able to do more and work independently. With each year of life there are new skills learned. In the early years you can discuss how they are able to care for themselves. A few years later you can discuss their abilities to do math or to read which can give them more freedom. The same holds true for the activities they are able to do with their friends. Let children begin to see that change is good.
2. Children’s routines are relaxing and important to them. Every child is different. However, especially young children embrace routine. Therefore as a parent you must acknowledge the importance of the routine. Try keeping some of your child’s routine even if some parts of the day have to change. Make small changes whenever possible. It may be a good idea to teach some relaxation techniques to your child if they get too worked up. Deep breathing techniques are a fairly easy yet effective place to start. Also a routine is a way to anticipate what is coming next or in the future. So discuss the day and weeks events so that a child will know what will happen.
3. During times of change it can be common for your child to feel stressed or act grumpy. Amen to this, right? This can be true of children or adults. Depending on your child’s personality and past experience with change this can be a very high level of stress. Being mindful of this and remaining relaxed can and will go a long way. The way you respond will speak volumes to your child because of how children tend to model their parents.
4. Address catastrophic thinking. Children naturally tend to think the worst when they are stressed. Therefore, a simple conversation for you may be all that is needed. Conversation like these may take some time, but it is worth it. Ask your child to tell you what happened during their day and systematically reshape their day. For example, when your child says they have no friends at school you could ask a series of questions. Hopefully then you can find out if everyone is stressing or if one conversation with one person did not go well. These conversations can also help your child gain a new perspective on reality that will hopefully carry with them throughout their lives.
5. Help them find reasonable solutions. Children, as with adults, need to see change as a positive message in their lives. This is also an opportunity to talk about finding solutions. When things change problem solving may be needed. Encourage children to talk in a productive way to discuss any possible solutions.
6. Remember as a parent you are giving your child the tools to handle change. The way parents handle times of change speck volumes as to how your child would handle change. Try to do what you can to make change as fun as possible. It is important to remember that change is temporary. Change will become routine again. If done successfully your impact can set your child up for success.
Change is a fact of life. With life’s ups and downs one thing is for sure, life changes. With the start of the new school year you and your child might have to adjust to the demands of going to class. Hopefully with a little help from each other change can be a success.
